Wednesday, May 20, 2009

A Moment of Clarity

I feel sad today. I feel like there is something missing. Like there is something I need or want but I have no idea what it is. So I've listened to Ryan Adams cover of "Wonderwall" about a million times and Bethany Joy Galeotti's "Feel This" a million and one. And then for a million and two times I listened to Kate Voegele's "Kindly Unspoken".

Then I revisted a poem I stareted about a month ago. Tweaked it. Finished it. I don't feel any better. But at least something good came out of the day. But then "good" is all relative. Enjoy.

A Moment of Clarity

I search for truth in your eyes
As you speak to me lies
You’re hiding behind the words you speak
Both you and I
Both you and me
When will the sun rise?
When will the war end?
When will we finally let
Can you feel the butterflies?
The chills you leave down my spine?
Or my heart racing towards the finish line?
I look for the moment
When we both stop playing the game
Resign to the sidelines
Where it’s just the reality of you and I
Is this the moment?
Or did the moment just pass us by?
Hiding our hearts
Hiding behind the notion
Love is overrated
Behind the belief we’re just too good for love
I at times want to surrender
Give into defeat
Because the fa├žade is getting too painful to keep
I search for truth in between the lies
I dig to decipher what you are saying in between the lines
All the while hiding behind my wall
My wall not as impregnable as I want to think
How did I let you get to me?
I find myself suddenly wanting to
Taste your kiss
Smell your scent
Feel your love
As your thick arms wrap around me…
And then I remember
The war I’m fighting in
My moment of clarity
I have yet to receive
So I lay in wait
And in want
Afraid to see

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